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Sonntag, 23. Februar 2014

Falling in Love.......again and again

Is it possible to fall in love again and again? Everyday? With the same guy?
YES it definitely is possible as that is what's happening to me.
I don't know if u noticed but me and my boyfriend had a break a few weeks ago, after many bad times and big fights we had a break(we had 2 ones before)
BUT now we are back together and it feels even better, he changed so much for the better, he really makes an effort, he really works on himself which makes me proud of him and that I am his main inspiration is just WOW.
He is my main inspiration now as well so we both benefit from each others changes.
That is awesome I think.
I never felt so much love for him, and daily I fall more for him.
Our love now feels so much deeper and intense.
We deal so much better now with our own crap and our bad pasts, mental health conditions and issues.
We can now really be there for each other cos we finally accepted that we are worthy and that we deserve all the best.
I became so much stronger due to the whole stress between us, I know now I can live on my own, I can fight alone I don't need him to live my life, BUT also I know my life is so much brighter and better with him in it.
We have a long distance realtionship and yeah it does hurt often that we aren't together in person BUT I try to avoid that thinking, because I realized either way in person or not I have him in my life, if that's the only possible way to have him I will be fine cos I don't want to lose him again and actually I wanna spend the rest of our Lifes together in which way ever is possible.
I am not saying I prefer it this way LOL far from that but if it will be the only possible way I will do it.
He is much more now the man I always wanted, he is amazing , he did so much lately and I still can't believe that he did it partly for me.
I am just amazed by him, and I feel proven about what I always said about him, that he is a good man, that he has a big heart and that I am proud of him.
I love him and I will love him till my very last breath and beyond.
So yeah some of u will say it's stupid to keep this rel. but I don't care cos it's my life, some of u will maybe say it wont work but I don't care either. I mean even my own mother does this kind of badmouthing it and excuses it with saying she is just tired of him hurting me, even though I know she does it more because she just can't stand the fact that I am so much stronger and independant now.
Because I know the right ones will wish me luck, will be happy for me and support me so yeah.
I did also become more independant and I don't care that much about what others say about the things I say and do or even how I look.
It's healthier for me, and I mean in the end it's only important what I think about myelf, and the ones I love think about me.
And if he reads this: Baby? I love you, Ich liebe dich, Je t'aime, Te quiero, Ti amo! <3

Freitag, 14. Februar 2014

My Valentines day :)

Flowers from my honey :)
Yes I got roses from my boyfriend in australia :)
Am I lucky or what?
I am happy about them and even though I am shaking out of sadness and anger(about my mother) I am happy that I got such wonderful flowers.........well the colors of the roses have different meanings and yellow ones aren't good ones LOL but in this case they are cos I do believe he loves me.
Wish u all a good evening/night/morning :)

Valentines Day or not?


Valentines day, actually my second one where I am not Single, still kinda weird :)

Well what can I say? As you all probably know by now I love holidays and celebrating things like that.

BUT I think when u are in a relationship where u truly love each other it shouldn't matter if it is Valentines day or not, you should always show ur other half that u love them.
Tenderness, Love, Romance, Affection, Sensuality, all this is needed and wanted every day not only on one day a year!
I think we all should remember that.
Yes sure why not buy flowers, or a necklace or a stuffed animal, make a candle light dinner or a wellness weekend during the year?
You don't have to wait for 14th february to make something speical for the person you love.
And my opinion to this day is, as long as we don't only use it to pretend we care and love our partner, and show it just once a year it can be a very nice, lovely day.
It's the day of the Lovers it means celebrating our love more then usual, it means really realizing what u have with ur partner.
So relationships, Love means effort u have to make an effort every day of the relationship, and it shouldn't even feel like effort, u know what I mean?
Make ur partner feel special on every day u are with them.
We all know nothing in this world is promised, so let us really enjoy every moment with our other half and make it to a special one as long as we can.
I do love to get flowers and presents, messages and posts on my wall from my boyfriend on this very special day and I don't want him to stop that.
I love Valentines day as I said for me it is a day to celebrate the love even more, and I think love does deserve such a day.
As long as we not ONLY show our love to our partner on this day everything is okay and we can all enjoy it.
Yeah there are ppl who don't like that day but hey u know what? You don't have to celebrate it, but let others do what they want to!
Dont ruin their Valentines days!
And also stop grumbling "Yeah it's just another day where the corporations make money", so what?
That's life, they make money and don't care about the love on this day BUT
isn't it more important that the ppl who celebrate Valentines day and spend money on their partner enjoy it and feel even closer on this day?
That's what it should be about, so if u don't like it, just shut up, u are not forced to celebrate Valentines day.
For all the others,
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY :)

Freitag, 7. Februar 2014

New Poem from today

Appreciate what I have


I appreciate the Life I've got,

you ask me if it's easy? No it's not!
But I learned to live it, beyond my limits,
I am stronger now and also vivid.
Now I dedicate my Life to help and support, cos Life is way too short,
to only suffer and also doubt, cos Love is whats it all about.
Love for myself and for others, bring joy and faith to all the strugglers.
I know my purpose now, and hope to show I am worth this Gift of Life somehow.
I do believe in many things, god, humanity and that I can fly without wings.
I'll live every day as it would be my last, and make everyone the best.
We don't know how long we will be here, so let's be loyal and sincere.
Our whole Life through and all the time, cos to love, heal and help is not a crime!
I know now what does really matter, so let us change the world for the better!

©Audrey Valentine 2014

Samstag, 1. Februar 2014

This man (POEM)

This man


There was this man, he showed me everything,
I did not know anything
but I was willing to reach new shores, but not without fear,
There was this man, whom I loved so much.
I, after all, so much wanted in my life.
There was this day that changed everything
there was this hand that turned.
He broke my heart just like that, I sadly said goodbye.
A nothing, I am for him now.
Nothing, he is for me now,
Nothing except.... Everything!

©2014 Audrey Valentine

True Heros - I want u to meet another two strong women and in my eyes heroes